41 days until I hop on a plane and leave for Africa.
All of this time, I have felt nothing but excitement for this new adventure that the Lord is bringing me on. I still am unbelievably excited, but reality is starting to set in a little bit. I'm thinking of leaving my family. Leaving my friends. Being done with college. Student teaching at a place where I don't know a single person in that country. Being immersed in another culture for four months. I didn't even think 4 months sounded like that long of a time before, but now it seems like a very long time. I'm sure once I'm there, it's going to fly by, but right now it seems like a long time to be without Dr. Pepper, without pizza, and without the people I love (not necessarily in that order!)
Sometimes, as I imagine saying goodbye to everyone and being alone in another country... I start to panic a little bit, thinking what am I doing?! But then I see the faces of the children, and a calmness comes over me, and I know. This is where I'm supposed to be. I know there will be challenging times up ahead. Periods of homesickness, sickness in general, and loneliness... but I'm excited to trust God in ways that I never have before. I know that His presence will be there with me through the good times and the bad.
"My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness." -2 Corinth. 12:9
Now I just need to read this when I'm going through those difficult times :)
A little more than a month. Wow.
"Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth." -1 John 3:18
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
Living Through the Longing
We had another SOS meeting tonight, and sometimes, it's almost hard because the longing to be in Africa is so great. There are times where my heart just longs to be there. I want to hug those beautiful children. I want to listen to stories from those incredible men and women. I want to experience the joy, the heartache, the fulfillment, and the pain.
Jim Elliot once said, "Let not the longing slay the appetite of your living."
I'm finishing up my last semester of classes in the next couple months, which means I'll be leaving the dear friends that I've made throughout the course of my college career. Yes, there is SO much living to be done right here, right now... and I don't want to waste this chapter by dreaming about the next one.
Soon enough, I'll be writing on this blog from Africa. Until that time, I want to be completely living each day leading up to my trip, and soaking in the wonderful relationships I have here.
Jim Elliot once said, "Let not the longing slay the appetite of your living."
I'm finishing up my last semester of classes in the next couple months, which means I'll be leaving the dear friends that I've made throughout the course of my college career. Yes, there is SO much living to be done right here, right now... and I don't want to waste this chapter by dreaming about the next one.
Soon enough, I'll be writing on this blog from Africa. Until that time, I want to be completely living each day leading up to my trip, and soaking in the wonderful relationships I have here.
Tuesday, March 1, 2011
AFRICA AFRICA AFRICA
Ok, so I'm going to stretch my technological capabilities here, and try to put up a youtube video... we'll see if it works.
Wow, who knew it could be so easy! Doesn't this video just make your heart smile though? It almost makes me cry because I just long to sing and laugh with those precious children now. But you know what... God is in the waiting. He's using this time to teach me and prepare me now... plus giving me ample time to pray :)
Oh, and other exciting news... I just got accepted to student teach abroad through UNI's program! I'll most likely be student teaching at International School Moshi: http://www.ismoshi.com/. I'm so excited to do my student teaching there! Yet, at the same time, I'm nervous. I won't know anyone there, and it is going to be a completely different experience than being in Tororo. But, as Corrie Ten Boom said, "Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God." This is the perfect opportunity for me to trust the God who has my life in His hands.
I don't know if any of you have gone cliff jumping before (into water of course!) but it is one of the most scary/thrilling/fun things! I feel like I'm jumping off a very high cliff right now... and although it's scary and I know it might be a little painful, it's thrilling and full of God-given life. And I know that while jumping, I'm in the hands of an all-knowing and all-loving God.
Less than four months from now, I will be in Africa. Unbelievable.
Friday, January 14, 2011
Dying to Self
"'If anyone would come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will save it."
-Luke 9:23-24
The Lord has continually brought up this passage in the last few weeks, and I've just been dwelling upon what it really means to deny oneself. Is it giving up my "rights" to a hot shower? To food that I like? To safety? To saving my skin from the intrusion of needles? Because I'm sure all those things will happen in Africa. However, the Lord has been revealing it to me that while those things may be part of denying myself, it really goes FAR beyond that. Now, hold on to that thought.
Over break, I read a biography on Gladys Aylward. What a remarkable woman! The Lord used this small woman to stop a prison riot, to lead hundreds of children across the mountains of China to escape from the Japanese, and to bring many people to Christ. This is a woman who has many incredible accomplishments to be proud of, yet what does she say? She says, "I wasn't God's first choice for what I've done for China…I don't know who it was…It must have been a man…a well-educated man. I don't know what happened. Perhaps he died. Perhaps he wasn't willing…and God looked down…and saw Gladys Aylward…And God said - "Well, she's willing." Humility. Gladys Aylward was a parlor maid that was turned down by the Mission in England. They told her she was too old to learn the language, she wasn't good at theology, and pretty much that she would not be a good missionary. Weakness.
"'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." -2 Corinth. 12:9
"He must become greater; I must become less." -John 3:30
""So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, "We are unworthy servants, we have only done what was our duty." -Luke 17:10
This is what the Lord has been repeatedly showing me lately: God uses the humble and the weak. What does this have to do with denying myself? Everything. It is knowing that in and of myself, there is nothing good in me, that all my righteous acts are like filthy rags. The only good in me is because of Christ and His power at work within me. It is wanting less of me and more of Christ. It is coming to the end of myself and depending solely upon Christ and His sufficiency. It is knowing that I am simply a TOOL. I am an unworthy servant simply doing my duty.... and what an honor it is to be a part of His work. Do you see the connections? The ironic thing is that it is in dying to ourselves that we truly find life. The Lord is the treasure that is completely worth dying to ourselves and losing everything for.
Of course, my entire life will be a journey of dying to myself. Unfortunately, my sinful nature is selfish and prideful. But I pray that He may become more and that I may become less, so that all the more, His power may be at work within me and I can be a tool to accomplish His awesome purposes.
-Luke 9:23-24
The Lord has continually brought up this passage in the last few weeks, and I've just been dwelling upon what it really means to deny oneself. Is it giving up my "rights" to a hot shower? To food that I like? To safety? To saving my skin from the intrusion of needles? Because I'm sure all those things will happen in Africa. However, the Lord has been revealing it to me that while those things may be part of denying myself, it really goes FAR beyond that. Now, hold on to that thought.
Over break, I read a biography on Gladys Aylward. What a remarkable woman! The Lord used this small woman to stop a prison riot, to lead hundreds of children across the mountains of China to escape from the Japanese, and to bring many people to Christ. This is a woman who has many incredible accomplishments to be proud of, yet what does she say? She says, "I wasn't God's first choice for what I've done for China…I don't know who it was…It must have been a man…a well-educated man. I don't know what happened. Perhaps he died. Perhaps he wasn't willing…and God looked down…and saw Gladys Aylward…And God said - "Well, she's willing." Humility. Gladys Aylward was a parlor maid that was turned down by the Mission in England. They told her she was too old to learn the language, she wasn't good at theology, and pretty much that she would not be a good missionary. Weakness.
"'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me." -2 Corinth. 12:9
"He must become greater; I must become less." -John 3:30
""So you also, when you have done all that you were commanded, say, "We are unworthy servants, we have only done what was our duty." -Luke 17:10
This is what the Lord has been repeatedly showing me lately: God uses the humble and the weak. What does this have to do with denying myself? Everything. It is knowing that in and of myself, there is nothing good in me, that all my righteous acts are like filthy rags. The only good in me is because of Christ and His power at work within me. It is wanting less of me and more of Christ. It is coming to the end of myself and depending solely upon Christ and His sufficiency. It is knowing that I am simply a TOOL. I am an unworthy servant simply doing my duty.... and what an honor it is to be a part of His work. Do you see the connections? The ironic thing is that it is in dying to ourselves that we truly find life. The Lord is the treasure that is completely worth dying to ourselves and losing everything for.
Of course, my entire life will be a journey of dying to myself. Unfortunately, my sinful nature is selfish and prideful. But I pray that He may become more and that I may become less, so that all the more, His power may be at work within me and I can be a tool to accomplish His awesome purposes.
I'm just trying out putting pictures on my blog, so the picture is kind of random. Although, I do have to say that I am very thankful to have these girls on the journey of dying to self with me. They are incredible women of God, and I love them!
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
Set Apart
Elisabeth Elliot wrote, "The preoccupations of young women- their looks, their clothes, their social life- do not change very much from generation to generation. But in every generation, there seem to be a few who make other choices."
This quote has always struck me and put a desire in my heart to be one of the few. It is so easy to get caught up with the things of this world, but I want to be one of the few who lives a life completely devoted to Christ- a woman who is so caught up in the realities of her King that the things of this world seem trivial.
I want to be one of the few who pours herself out for others and loves selflessly. A woman who loves deeply without expecting anything in return.
I am praying that the Lord will shape me into this kind of woman. A woman who reflects His beauty.
This quote has always struck me and put a desire in my heart to be one of the few. It is so easy to get caught up with the things of this world, but I want to be one of the few who lives a life completely devoted to Christ- a woman who is so caught up in the realities of her King that the things of this world seem trivial.
I want to be one of the few who pours herself out for others and loves selflessly. A woman who loves deeply without expecting anything in return.
I am praying that the Lord will shape me into this kind of woman. A woman who reflects His beauty.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Drawing me
Warren Day (the midwest regional administer for Africa Inland Mission) encouraged me to start praying for a few people that I can really be drawn to throughout my time in Africa.
It's not possible that I can invest my time and energy into all 400+ kids. I wish I could, but I can't. So, I'm going to start praying from now until next summer that God will divinely appoint my relationships in Africa-that He will draw me to a few people that I can pour myself into as well as learn from them.
The great thing is, about 9 months from now, I'll be writing about the answer to my prayers. I'll be writing about the special people that the Lord drew me to and their impact on my life. How cool is that?! Praise God!
It's not possible that I can invest my time and energy into all 400+ kids. I wish I could, but I can't. So, I'm going to start praying from now until next summer that God will divinely appoint my relationships in Africa-that He will draw me to a few people that I can pour myself into as well as learn from them.
The great thing is, about 9 months from now, I'll be writing about the answer to my prayers. I'll be writing about the special people that the Lord drew me to and their impact on my life. How cool is that?! Praise God!
Thursday, September 9, 2010
AFRICA?!
So this blog is for my trip to Africa next summer, but I'm SO excited about it that I couldn't resist creating a blog for it right now (I keep telling myself it's so I can get used to having a blog before I go... but really, it's because I'm just so excited!)
People have asked me recently, "Why Africa?" I can't say that I have a good answer for them. I don't even know how to explain it. All I know is that there is a BURN in my heart for the people of Africa. Every time I hear Africa mentioned or see pictures of others that have been there, a passion and excitement infuses its way through my entire being and I just know that I'm SUPPOSED to be there and that God has CALLED me there.
The Lord has shown me that even though it's good to be excited about where He's called me, right now, He's placed me at Northwestern College and He wants me to be fully here. Missions doesn't just occur overseas, but it happens right here. I need to be a missionary here by praying boldly for others, loving others with the love of Christ, giving of my time and money, trusting the Lord, staying rooted in God's Word, and sharing the Gospel of Christ.
So, I'm going to be fully here this year as a missionary, by the power of Christ. And I would encourage everyone to do the same, since we are all missionaries wherever we are.
People have asked me recently, "Why Africa?" I can't say that I have a good answer for them. I don't even know how to explain it. All I know is that there is a BURN in my heart for the people of Africa. Every time I hear Africa mentioned or see pictures of others that have been there, a passion and excitement infuses its way through my entire being and I just know that I'm SUPPOSED to be there and that God has CALLED me there.
The Lord has shown me that even though it's good to be excited about where He's called me, right now, He's placed me at Northwestern College and He wants me to be fully here. Missions doesn't just occur overseas, but it happens right here. I need to be a missionary here by praying boldly for others, loving others with the love of Christ, giving of my time and money, trusting the Lord, staying rooted in God's Word, and sharing the Gospel of Christ.
So, I'm going to be fully here this year as a missionary, by the power of Christ. And I would encourage everyone to do the same, since we are all missionaries wherever we are.
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